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GREG GUTFELD: Take the media’s words with a grain of salt


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It is Dec. 6. You realize what which means? Nationwide Miners Day. The fellows that work underground, not the opposite type of miners. So put your pants again on, CNN.

So have you ever heard the fantastic information? Make-A-Want lastly acquired wind of Jimmy’s story and is giving him a makeover. Goals actually do come true. What rodeo clown did you service to get that shirt? Anyway, we will reply that later. But in addition huge information: Disgraced lawyer Michael Avenatti has been sentenced to 14 years in jail for embezzling hundreds of thousands of {dollars}. 

They really feel strongly. Yeah, man is slimier than a bowl of okra with a aspect of slugs.

Embezzling, after all, means stealing in case you do it whereas sporting a swimsuit, tie and a kind of attractive shirt garters. Thank God I labored out for the picture shoot. 

Along with the 14 years behind bars, Avenatti can even must pay virtually 11 million bucks in restitution to 4 purchasers and the IRS. Restitution — feels like once I pay girls to take a nap with me. 

Grownup movie actress Stormy Daniels, left, stands along with her lawyer Michael Avenatti throughout a information convention.
(AP Photograph/Mary Altaffer, File)

This new sentence is separate from the one he is presently serving, which is 5 years for attempting to extort cash from Nike and in addition stealing Stormy Daniels’s hard-earned money proper from underneath her Double Ds, in any other case generally known as Silicon Valley. Yep. 

He snatched $300 grand from a e book advance from Daniels. Guess I ought to have selected a greater verb there. However anyway, the money taken from Stormy, nevertheless, was straightforward to hint because it was all $1 payments.

GREG GUTFELD: WHEN THE TRUTH ‘BUBBLES UP,’ THE MEDIA BURIES IT

Avenatti will begin serving these 14 years after he finishes that time period, and by then, I will be 60. Now, for these of you too younger to recollect, Avenatti turned fairly the liberal hero. You realize, like a tax collector or a health care provider who gave intercourse adjustments to youngsters. 

It occurred when he took on President Trump by sidling up subsequent to Stormy Daniels’s rump. Poor factor. She thought Avenatti was going to assist her, however as an alternative he screwed her, one thing she’d usually receives a commission for, however on this case, it was the reverse.

And the media, they could not get sufficient of Avenatti and that slick cranium of his, handicapped by their very own biases and poor judgment. Bear in mind all this nonsense?

CHRIS CUOMO, 2018: You bought fortunate tonight. We’re again with lawyer Michael Avenatti. He’s a primary participant.

ANA NAVARRO, 2018: To me, you are just like the Holy Spirit. You might be all locations always.

JOY BEHAR, 2018: He is on the market saving the nation.

CHRIS MATTHEWS, 2018: Look, I feel you are doing a hell of a job… I do not assume you are on this for cash.

BRIAN STELTER, 2018: Waiting for 2020, one of many the explanation why I am taking you critically as a contender is due to your presence on cable information.

You are like that sack of eyeballs at the back of my fridge that did not age properly. No surprise CNN gave Brian Stelter his strolling papers, no matter it takes to get him to train. That was imply. 

However this entire Avenatti scandal bolsters arguments you have come to listen to quite a bit from this present. First, I all the time say, “By no means date a stripper” — and never simply because it is your step-mom. 

But in addition that the media fortunately chases any shiny ball positioned in entrance of them so long as the shiny ball indulges their assumptions. On this case, it was all about evil Trump. Avenatti capitalized on their Trump derangement and rode it like a drugstore donkey into any left-wing moist dream manufacturing unit that might have him.

However the excellent news: It is one more media narrative falling aside. The information builds tales like they are a home of playing cards, and as time flies by, it creates a gust of wind which blows their homes over. And a few take extra time than others. 

You bought former President Trump’s nuclear secrets and techniques that turned up in a cardboard field in Mar-a-Lago that ended up being memorabilia. In order that story went away sooner than the polyester rash on Jimmy’s chest. They accused Trump of what the Rosenbergs had been executed for, however no correction essential. I am considering the media’s acquired extra individuals killed than Kat’s cooking.

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Seems crypto king Sam Bankman-Fried was extra like Klepto King after it was found he was utilizing purchasers’ funds allegedly to backstop losses at one other enterprise he based. However like Avenatti driving in on Trump derangement, creepy Sam rode in on advantage signaling. One other rip-off the media swallows like a pound of sardines throughout feeding time at “The View.”

CEO of FTX Sam Bankman-Fried testifies during a hearing before the House Financial Services Committee at Rayburn House Office Building on Capitol Hill Dec. 8, 2021, in Washington, D.C.

CEO of FTX Sam Bankman-Fried testifies throughout a listening to earlier than the Home Monetary Companies Committee at Rayburn Home Workplace Constructing on Capitol Hill Dec. 8, 2021, in Washington, D.C.
(Alex Wong/Getty Pictures)

And the place did all that cash go? Homes, swimming swimming pools, medicine. He actually did not use consumer cash for a haircut and breast discount. He is what occurs while you mate Mark Cuban with a rest room brush. It is uncanny. 

I suppose it is a coincidence he was a high Democrat donor and he hasn’t been arrested but. Prefer it’s a coincidence that vacation events finish when Brian Kilmeade exhibits up.

We’re additionally studying a complete lot about how the media and the federal government colluded to subvert an election by way of social media. Regardless of what the media stated, Hunter’s laptop computer is as actual as my attractive, hairless pecs. 

The purpose is, I’ll inform you what you already know. Regardless of the mainstream media backs, run screaming from it such as you simply noticed Ana Navarro in a three-way mirror. And no matter they inform you, you recognize it is not true. Take it with a grain of salt like once I promised my interns a bonus. It is on them for believing me.

And the following time the mainstream media tries to promote you one thing like a charismatic lawyer preventing for the underdog, maintain strolling. As a result of not like you, their reminiscences are shorter than our president’s. They assume you are silly and lazy. And, boy, if that is not the pot calling the kettle an individual of coloration. 

It is no surprise nobody trusts them anymore. And that is why this Christmas, so lots of them are getting a severance bundle together with a lump of coal. 

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